Any control freaks out there?

If you ever want to be reminded of what you have control over–and what you don’t–just think of standing (or sitting) inside a hoola hoop. 

Whatever is on the inside of the hoop is what you have control over. That would be…..sweet, little you. Your thoughts, your body, your desires, your emotions, your actions, your speech, your choices. 

Everything that’s on the outside of the hoop is out of your control.

That means you don’t have control over, well, let me break it to you gently…..jack s*%#!  Not other people, places, things, weather, nature, pandemics, the stock market or how many M&M’s are (or aren’t) in a bag.

It also means you don’t have control over pesky stuff like: what someone thinks of you, how they act, look, speak, make decisions, or choose to live their life. 

Doesn’t this, some days, just make you want to scream? (asking for a friend)

The next time you’re feeling a little edgy or at loose ends (more than likely, that’ll be today or tomorrow), call up the image of a hoola hoop.

Ask yourself:  Is this something that’s inside my hoop?

If yes, hooray! You can do something about it. What a relief. Now get after it.  


Is this something outside my hoop? 

If yes, also hooray!  Except now you get to ‘take your sticky mitts off the spaceship’ (as Anne Lamott says) and get to work on letting go.  

Ah, the ‘ol letting go thingy dingy…..the very opposite of having control.

I think this is where so many people find the Serenity Prayer helpful: 

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change (everything outside of my hoop), courage to change the things I can (everything inside of my hoop) and the wisdom to know the difference (between your hoop and my hoop). Hoop hoop hooray.  

Simple, right? But not easy…

And therein lies the practice. 

Cultivating serenity, courage and wisdom is no small feat in these whackadoodle times. 

The upside is, the world is sure giving us lots of opportunities to practice.

What hoop are you practicing in these days? (Hint: if there’s anyone else in your hoop, oops! Wrong hoop.) 

I love hearing from you, I do, it’s true. xo